A Very Informative Article On How To Open Coconuts

It shouldn’t be hard to get up for work when you only have a three day week right? Right. But somehow every morning I legitimately convince myself from my bed that no Victoria, of course you don’t have to be at work at nine, you don’t have to be anywhere at any time, you live outside of the concept of time, remember? Contrary to personal belief, I do not live outside of the concept of time. I’m just late to work a lot.

So all that to say, I was late to work. But when you get to work and you’re besties with your boss, working isn’t the first thing on the agenda. We had more important matters to attend to. We had coconuts.


They looked like this, aka I had no living idea how to approach them. I’m from upstate New York, they don’t realize coconut comes in a form other than shavings or water up there. Erin, however, is not from upstate New York and this was not her first rodeo. After three youtube videos and a whole lot of knife action, we gave in. “This is how my people do it” said Erin as she marched out the back door and started slamming the coconut down on the concrete (#mustbeacubanboss says her husband). It rolled into the pool, through the grass, and around the block before it finally cracked itself open. I took a video that I will definitely use as blackmail in the future. We really just walk through the strangest situations with the highest heels, and it’s a miracle we make it out alive.

As if that wasn’t enough excitement for one day, we spent 2 hours looking up pictures of surfing Santas so I could make this postcard (ain’t no design intern) and finished the afternoon by eating an entire pizza, making friends with Dennis from Office Depot (who stole my flash drive, eff you Dennis), and watching the Prince episode of New Girl during work hours. Happy Wednesday.



Erin, showing the coconut who’s boss

Until next time,



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