Day Ten: Upperclassmen Angst

5708599413_2fa821519f_z

When I was a freshman, I thought juniors and seniors were being dramatic. There’s no way it was all that different to be an upperclassman than an underclassman. But last week when the girl who has lived two doors down from me for the past six months introduced herself at the drinking fountain, I realized that it’s all true.

With your third year comes a deep growing resentment against the rules of the establishment, especially campus safety. Just the words “walking campus” are enough to set me off. Parking tickets have just become part of the cost of living, because it is approximately negative seventeen degrees outside and hypothermia does not go with these shoes.

I have genuine fear about how I’ll react to the word “mandatory” post-grad because right now it just means something I’m definitely not going to be there for. I can email in excuses for the rest of my life, right?

Yesterday in a hall meeting a girl I’ve only seen in passing told me that she’s been afraid of me all year because she read this post (oops) about freshmen screaming in the halls. Very welcoming, Victoria. Nice work.

Underclassmen angst comes even for your social life. Despite the fact that I have plenty of time left, I’ve thought to myself more than once “what’s the point of making new friends, we’ll be out of here soon enough anyways.” And Drake’s “no new friends, no no no” echoes through my head with shocking consistency. Besides that, midnight now feels like a totally reasonable bed time. The dorm party days of my youth seem strange and irresponsible. I can feel myself getting boring.

Academically I honestly can’t tell which is worse, classes that treat you like a child or classes that require actual effort. Either way, I don’t think I’ve made eye contact with a professor in at least two weeks.

And the cornerstone of upperclassmen angst: Fear of the Future. Behind our facade, we’ve all hyperventilated at least once about the general trajectory of our lives because all of the sudden that feels very close.

Just wait till senioritis comes calling.

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “Day Ten: Upperclassmen Angst

  1. Megan O. says:

    Oh my, wait for the days when you’re in a job you’re overqualified for, you don’t know how to make friends in real life, and 10:30pm seems like them middle of the night. Quarter-life angst?

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s